Getting ‘Franked’

One day, I was weight training at Cedar Hill Rec Center in Victoria, BC, Canada when I heard an unusual noise. Looking around because of impaired hearing, I noticed an elderly and frail man being wheeled into the training area in a wheelchair. He was attended too by two ladies. One of the ladies took the lead and helped get his jacket off while the other was preparing a table used by Physio Therapists. After they got him out of the wheelchair and unto the table, the one lady proceeded with her own weight training program while the other attended to what I know now to be Frank. I also know, as of today that Flo was/is his physio and Carol is Frank`s wife.

My unfair judgement of the moment was a huge mis-projection on my part. I thought to myself that Frank was wasting his time. It would take forever to have Frank move a limb with or without with the support of Flo….I may add. Experiencing another ‘pity moment’ at the time made me look away from Frank and his struggles with some disgust. I thought, among other things, that everyone was simply wasting their time and what could possibly be the purpose of the exercise….figuratively and literally speaking. Frank was a lost cause, in my limited perception. This was a complete and total reflection/projection of how I was feeling about myself at that time. Oh yes, I was, in appearance, much healthier, fitter and had much more going for me physically but I did not feel that. I felt like the Universe betrayed me with some cruel joke. She was taunting me to see exactly how much I could take before screaming….”I have had enough….take me ‘home’”. But, as she always does, she knows where to stop with me. She taunts me with depressive states, from time to time, while trying to teach me patience, tolerance, impermanence and detachment. And, given that I have been blessed with a body, albeit flawed with many mis-diagnosed diseases supposedly explaining my chronic pain and fatigue. I have thoroughly enjoyed the pleasures my body has brought me. It allowed me to play like a little boy for most of my life. Sometimes it would even fool me into thinking that I did not have a ‘ceiling’ to deal with. But, like a physio from the Post Polio Clinic in Vancouver told me one time, “you can start getting fit again but you will never be an Olympian”. She was being factious but I have always wanted to be an Olympian. And, in moments I felt like I was, only to be brought back to reality….with a thump.

So, there is Frank who has presented himself to me when I required him most. As much as I wanted to ignore Frank and his moaning speech, I could not ignore how Flo reacted to him. She was always smiling and laughing. Being deaf did not help the fact that I could not make out what his ‘moans’ meant but clearly they had meaning. Week after week Frank and I would parallel our training sessions and week after week Frank started to ‘grow on me’. Finally, one Tuesday, I got ‘Franked’. I came in to work-out reluctantly because I was so sore, tired and feeling terribly depressed. My rehab on my knee was going much slower than I projected and I was getting very impatient with losing more of my physical faculties. I could feel anger building and was not a ‘happy camper’. And then, in a glorious moment, I looked over and there was Flo, buckled over in laughter and Frank was not relenting. I gazed in wonder as too how this debilitated man could permeate his environment with so much love and affection. His attitude dwarfed mine and I felt small and ashamed for behaving so pitifully. I remember thinking right there and then that I would always, to the best of my ability, smile as much as I could, regardless of the situation because of how Frank made me feel, in that precious moment. I was ‘Franked’. As bad as things were for Frank, at least by my perception, he still could muster the courage and caring to make his environment a better place….yay to Frank and his beautiful soul.

Apparently Frank suffered something similar to a stroke a year and a half ago while practising as a Professor. Carol his equally beautiful, understanding, supporting and loving wife also deserves a ‘bouquet’ for attending to him and helping him, along with Flo, to actualize his new goal…..to walk again. Flo says, “that given his progress thus far, he will succeed”. And, I for one have no doubt.

After so many months of Frank inspiring me, I decided to share my experience with him today. But because of my poor hearing and not being able to understand him, I shared Frank`s impact on me with Carol. She said I could share that with Frank if I liked, and she would help translate his words for me. So I did and guess what? He thanked me and said I looked great and that his goal was to look like me again. Man, this guy just will not stop giving…..indirectly or directly….passively or actively….he just keeps on giving. Thank g_d for the Franks of this world and bless his loving heart and attitude.